First Phone Call Frights

            So you did it, you scored the digits! Now what? Should you play the three day rule? NO!!! Call them up! If you are at a bar and through your drunken haze you get the digits to someone standing at the bar, the three day rule applies if you plan to call them at all. But the online dating world runs a bit differently. You’ve been chatting it up with that person for a few weeks now, and you feel like you already know them. So let’s jump on the phone and say hi!

• Conversations always start with “Hi!” so that seem like a good place. You get the first sample of their voice and it stirs up the butterflies in your stomach.
• The next step would be to ask how they are. It invites them to respond back and ask you how you are as well.
• Think of a funny antidote that happened to you today. Like when you went to go work out and accidentally dropped the weight, causing everyone in the gym to turn at look at you while your face turned beet red. Starting out with a laugh is a good way to break the ice and get more relaxed into the phone call.
• Ask them how their day has been so far. Has anything interesting happened? Get them to start talking about themselves. When you ask someone about themselves, it signals to them that you are interested in them for more than just topical conversation.
• Ask them how they plan to spend the rest of their day. Are they going jogging? Are they having lunch with friends? They are? Where?
• Respond by letting them know what you are doing as well. More than likely they will respond to the things you are doing and you can build your conversation from there.
• If you find the conversation starting to lag a bit, go back to those common interests you both have. Where did they say their favorite place to rock climb was? Oh yeah, have they ever been to your favorite place?
• If you’re feeling a little daring, make small suggestive comments like “Yeah, we should totally go to see that band play sometime! It would be so much fun!” It signals to them that you are eventually interested in meeting in person, without asking outright. If they feel the same, you will notice that they will also comment on doing things together in the future.
• Talk about your pets. Pets tell a lot about a person. Are they independent and curious like a cat? Or are they dependable and loyal like a dog? This will give insight into their personality and life. 

When you first talk to someone on the phone, it’s best to remember to relax and be yourself. We all get those butterflies flying, cracking voice and lump in the throat the first time we call someone we’re interested in. Just relax and enjoy the ride.

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